weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
