Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
