So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
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She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
my poor anus
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
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