i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
the liver wants what the liver wants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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