Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Randomize
