Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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