He uses pillows to masturbate.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Randomize
