Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
