Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
i think i scared a bird with my dick
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Randomize
