is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
I think I just sharted jello shots
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize
