Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
