Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
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