ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize