i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize
