paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Holy sore nipples Batman
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Randomize