just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
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