We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
love makes seman taste better
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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