woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
