Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize