problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
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