Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
