I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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