I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize
