I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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