carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
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