in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
