I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
