And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
