I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Randomize
