I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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