There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
