it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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