Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
