I accidentally had phone sex last night
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Randomize
