drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
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