DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
high people should be assigned attendants
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Randomize
