what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
