My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
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