dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize