Sry I called you an 8
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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