it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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