I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
smell my finger.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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