All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
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