the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
