They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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