weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
