Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
you had me at cake vodka
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
did you just send me my own nude
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
