Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Randomize
