Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
She announced her abortion via fbk
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
I wear drunk well.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
