I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
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