Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Randomize
